Monday, December 29, 2008
Tuesday, December 23, 2008
For Whom the Butt Tolls
“Please! Donate to the BDRS Fund today!” said a man in the beginning of a commercial. That man was Richard Rich, head of the BDRS. Rich was a well-liked guy, leading a research society dedicated to curing BD; better known as butt disease. Butt disease was a recently discovered disease, and little was known about its causes and effects. But one thing was sure; people wanted a cure.
Rich and his scientist friend Cassius Cash decided to start the BDRS, the Butt Disease Research Society, in 1995. Few acknowledged their efforts, but in recent years, people across the world have rallied in support of their valiant efforts to fight butt disease. Donation boxes were in schools, sports teams donated ticket sales to the fund, and a huge concert event was launched, all proceeds going to the BDRS fund. Money was pouring in from everywhere, and butt disease patients had more hope than ever for a cure.
Richard Rich awoke from his castle-size bed, yawning. Today was the start of another great day. After his morning routine, he picked up the phone and called Cassius. “Hey Cash! You ready for today?” he asked.
“Oh, you bet. I’ve been waiting for this for a while now.” replied Cassius.
“I’ll see you in a bit,” replied Richard, and hung up the phone.
An hour later, they were on a boat to visit an obscure and unusual island.
“This sure is the life, isn’t it?” said Richard to Cassius.
“Oh, I know. Who knew butt disease research would take us to such exotic lands!” Cassius responded in an exaggerated tone of voice. The two began to laugh.
“Butt disease! Hah! If only they knew. It was such a brilliant idea for us to make up this research society fund! With our brilliant minds, no one would ever know that it was all a ruse. These ‘visits to exotic islands in a search for the cure’… oh, how well we fooled everyone!” boasted Richard. The two continued to laugh about the situation.
In two weeks, they returned. At the doctor’s office, the two waited for the results of their check-up, so that they could return to America. The doctor entered, a strained look on his face.
“I have terrible news.” he said, solemn.
“Oh, no, what is it?” Richard and Cassius said in unison, fearing for the worst.
“You have… butt disease. The very disease you men work so hard to prevent and cure. I’m so sorry.” the doctor said, leaving the men.
This is why I should not be told to write these things. I will actually do it.
Rich and his scientist friend Cassius Cash decided to start the BDRS, the Butt Disease Research Society, in 1995. Few acknowledged their efforts, but in recent years, people across the world have rallied in support of their valiant efforts to fight butt disease. Donation boxes were in schools, sports teams donated ticket sales to the fund, and a huge concert event was launched, all proceeds going to the BDRS fund. Money was pouring in from everywhere, and butt disease patients had more hope than ever for a cure.
Richard Rich awoke from his castle-size bed, yawning. Today was the start of another great day. After his morning routine, he picked up the phone and called Cassius. “Hey Cash! You ready for today?” he asked.
“Oh, you bet. I’ve been waiting for this for a while now.” replied Cassius.
“I’ll see you in a bit,” replied Richard, and hung up the phone.
An hour later, they were on a boat to visit an obscure and unusual island.
“This sure is the life, isn’t it?” said Richard to Cassius.
“Oh, I know. Who knew butt disease research would take us to such exotic lands!” Cassius responded in an exaggerated tone of voice. The two began to laugh.
“Butt disease! Hah! If only they knew. It was such a brilliant idea for us to make up this research society fund! With our brilliant minds, no one would ever know that it was all a ruse. These ‘visits to exotic islands in a search for the cure’… oh, how well we fooled everyone!” boasted Richard. The two continued to laugh about the situation.
In two weeks, they returned. At the doctor’s office, the two waited for the results of their check-up, so that they could return to America. The doctor entered, a strained look on his face.
“I have terrible news.” he said, solemn.
“Oh, no, what is it?” Richard and Cassius said in unison, fearing for the worst.
“You have… butt disease. The very disease you men work so hard to prevent and cure. I’m so sorry.” the doctor said, leaving the men.
This is why I should not be told to write these things. I will actually do it.
Friday, December 19, 2008
MGS4 Raiden ADD Summary
Celes says:
Raiden is what would happen if Snake was designed to cater to yaoi fangirls
Dodgy says:
OH yeah
Celes says:
Long silver hair, girly face, gets spontaneous crotchgrabs...
Dodgy says:
that guy
Dodgy says:
thing
Dodgy says:
whatever
Celes says:
XD
Celes says:
Thing
Celes says:
I suppose he is a bit of a "thing" in MGS4
Celes says:
"Oh, yeah, I don't have real blood anymore. And lots of other special stuff." "...that's nice" "Yeah. Okay. I need dialisis or I am going to die." "Oh. That's not good." "Nah, it isn't."
LATER
"SNAKE! I am finally better! Except now I'm going to get crushed by a ship that's about to hit you." "Okay, thanks."
LATER
"Hey, I am kinda human now! Neat."
Dodgy says:
XD
Dodgy says:
wow
Celes says:
He has weird imprints on his body later on
Celes says:
Which is why I am assuming all of his limbs are artifical.
Celes says:
Especially since he previously lost them
Celes says:
Y'know, getting crushed by a ship
Celes says:
Raiden constantly lives through insane shit and then has to spend forever being hospitalized during that game
Celes says:
It infuriated my brother because he wanted to play as Raiden
Celes says:
"HEY GUYZ -slash slash crazy ninja knife fight, severe organ damage, bleeding- OKAY GUYS I AM GONNA JUMP INTO THE HELICOPTER NOW. ALRIGHT. -dead-"
Dodgy says:
XD
Celes says:
"SHIT I CAN'T KILL VAMP" "HEY SNAKE" "HEY" "I AM GONNA HAVE AN INNUENDO-FILLED BATTLE WITH VAMP AGAIN" "K" "-slash slash slash ninja knife fight Vamp is a flaming homosexual with creepy chest hair who seems to want to molest everyone bleeding severe organ damage slash slash VICTORY FOR RAIDEN-" "Hey. Raiden. I blew things up." "-cough hack sputter-" "Let's go!" "-drags self to Metal Gear-"
Celes says:
"Hey, shit, this place is exploding." "Yeah, Snake, I'm gonna get caught under this rubble and have to cut off my own arm now." "K. I'm gonna go do a mecha battle." "..ass." "YES I WIN AHA" "NOT TODAY SNAKE. I HAVE A GIGANTIC SHIP THAT I WILL CRUSH YOU WITH." "):" "NOT TODAY, LIQUID! I WILL GET CRUSHED BY YOUR SHIP INSTEAD OF SNAKE. MY ONLY USE IS TO GET ABUSED." "Thx"
Dodgy says:
hehehehehe
Raiden is what would happen if Snake was designed to cater to yaoi fangirls
Dodgy says:
OH yeah
Celes says:
Long silver hair, girly face, gets spontaneous crotchgrabs...
Dodgy says:
that guy
Dodgy says:
thing
Dodgy says:
whatever
Celes says:
XD
Celes says:
Thing
Celes says:
I suppose he is a bit of a "thing" in MGS4
Celes says:
"Oh, yeah, I don't have real blood anymore. And lots of other special stuff." "...that's nice" "Yeah. Okay. I need dialisis or I am going to die." "Oh. That's not good." "Nah, it isn't."
LATER
"SNAKE! I am finally better! Except now I'm going to get crushed by a ship that's about to hit you." "Okay, thanks."
LATER
"Hey, I am kinda human now! Neat."
Dodgy says:
XD
Dodgy says:
wow
Celes says:
He has weird imprints on his body later on
Celes says:
Which is why I am assuming all of his limbs are artifical.
Celes says:
Especially since he previously lost them
Celes says:
Y'know, getting crushed by a ship
Celes says:
Raiden constantly lives through insane shit and then has to spend forever being hospitalized during that game
Celes says:
It infuriated my brother because he wanted to play as Raiden
Celes says:
"HEY GUYZ -slash slash crazy ninja knife fight, severe organ damage, bleeding- OKAY GUYS I AM GONNA JUMP INTO THE HELICOPTER NOW. ALRIGHT. -dead-"
Dodgy says:
XD
Celes says:
"SHIT I CAN'T KILL VAMP" "HEY SNAKE" "HEY" "I AM GONNA HAVE AN INNUENDO-FILLED BATTLE WITH VAMP AGAIN" "K" "-slash slash slash ninja knife fight Vamp is a flaming homosexual with creepy chest hair who seems to want to molest everyone bleeding severe organ damage slash slash VICTORY FOR RAIDEN-" "Hey. Raiden. I blew things up." "-cough hack sputter-" "Let's go!" "-drags self to Metal Gear-"
Celes says:
"Hey, shit, this place is exploding." "Yeah, Snake, I'm gonna get caught under this rubble and have to cut off my own arm now." "K. I'm gonna go do a mecha battle." "..ass." "YES I WIN AHA" "NOT TODAY SNAKE. I HAVE A GIGANTIC SHIP THAT I WILL CRUSH YOU WITH." "):" "NOT TODAY, LIQUID! I WILL GET CRUSHED BY YOUR SHIP INSTEAD OF SNAKE. MY ONLY USE IS TO GET ABUSED." "Thx"
Dodgy says:
hehehehehe
Thursday, December 18, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Saturday, December 13, 2008
Toki o Kakeru Shonen
For my writing class, I need to make a pitch for a sequel to a movie I've seen recently. I picked Toki o Kakeru Shoujo, AKA The Girl Who Leapt Through Time. Planning has been interesting. It's a movie that's quite difficult to make a direct sequel of, so, I've gone for the sort of mirror-story-sequel that the movie itself did. The story of another tokikake. As I don't have much time for the planning, I've used the human counterparts to the SD cast as the cast for this assignment. In this case, I have used Roark as the leaper. Using a male instead of a female should make this fairly interesting. Here are the notes I've jotted down so far. Along with a ridiculous picture of a bald man in a muscle shirt staring angrily at a bee. Enjoy?
Monday, December 1, 2008
Orion Meme
1. What is your character's name?
Orion Maddox
2. What is your character's name in another language?
I take this question as an explanation of namesake:
Orion is "the hunter", a constellation, and Maddox means "lucky".
3. How old is he/she?
28
4. What is your character's race/species?
An evolved form of human.
5. Do they have a crush?
No. But he is a little self-obsessed.
6. Do they have many friends?
Sort of. His pet magpies and Raza, perhaps more.
7. What planet is your character from?
Mars
8. Does your character like to eat?
Yes
9. What's his/her favorite food?
Oranges
10. What's his/her favorite drink?
Wine
11. Is your character annoying?
Yes
13. Is your character loved?
Maybe
14. Is your character hated?
Definitely
15. Is he/she emo/goth?
No
16. Is he/she straight, bisexual, or gay?
Don't know. Might be asexual.
17. Is he/she a virgin?
Yes
18. Name 3 hobbies
Bounty hunting, taking care of his birds, doing whatever he wants
19. Is your character normal?
No
20. Is your character attractive?
Maybe?
21. How does your character handle emotions?
Ridiculously
22. Does your character have other forms?
No
23. Does your character overreact?
Yes
24. Is your character a criminal?
Maybe
25. Does your character go to school?
No
26. What's his/her IQ?
It's fluctuant
27. Does your character have a disease/curse?
No
28. Is your character dead?
No
29. Does your character have a family?
Yes
30. Has he/she encountered any tragic times in life?
No
31. What's the best time in your character's life?
ALL THE TIME
32. If you could name 1 friend, which would you relate to your character?
No one is as crazy as he is
33. Is your character single?
Yes, sort of
34. Has he/she developed any relationships?
Not real ones
35. Does he/she have an element?
Luck
36. Do you role-play your character?
Not yet
37. Do you write about your character?
Not yet
38. Does your character have a bad temper at times?
Probably
39. Does your character get depressed?
Probably
40. What's your characters favorite animal?
Magpies
41. Does your character have any fears?
Bad luck
42. Does your character have any weaknesses?
His dependance on luck
43. Does your character look up to anyone?
No
44. Does your character like music?
Maybe
45. What's your character's favorite type of music?
Undecided
46. Is he/she impatient?
Yes
47. What's something funny about your character?
He's very eccentric and extreme in emotions, but is never very serious.
48. Nicknames?
777, Nine Lives, Maddox
49. Does your character curse?
Probably
50. This test is over, what does your character have to say?
"Now get out of here, I need to look for my lucky rabbit's foot."
Orion Maddox
2. What is your character's name in another language?
I take this question as an explanation of namesake:
Orion is "the hunter", a constellation, and Maddox means "lucky".
3. How old is he/she?
28
4. What is your character's race/species?
An evolved form of human.
5. Do they have a crush?
No. But he is a little self-obsessed.
6. Do they have many friends?
Sort of. His pet magpies and Raza, perhaps more.
7. What planet is your character from?
Mars
8. Does your character like to eat?
Yes
9. What's his/her favorite food?
Oranges
10. What's his/her favorite drink?
Wine
11. Is your character annoying?
Yes
13. Is your character loved?
Maybe
14. Is your character hated?
Definitely
15. Is he/she emo/goth?
No
16. Is he/she straight, bisexual, or gay?
Don't know. Might be asexual.
17. Is he/she a virgin?
Yes
18. Name 3 hobbies
Bounty hunting, taking care of his birds, doing whatever he wants
19. Is your character normal?
No
20. Is your character attractive?
Maybe?
21. How does your character handle emotions?
Ridiculously
22. Does your character have other forms?
No
23. Does your character overreact?
Yes
24. Is your character a criminal?
Maybe
25. Does your character go to school?
No
26. What's his/her IQ?
It's fluctuant
27. Does your character have a disease/curse?
No
28. Is your character dead?
No
29. Does your character have a family?
Yes
30. Has he/she encountered any tragic times in life?
No
31. What's the best time in your character's life?
ALL THE TIME
32. If you could name 1 friend, which would you relate to your character?
No one is as crazy as he is
33. Is your character single?
Yes, sort of
34. Has he/she developed any relationships?
Not real ones
35. Does he/she have an element?
Luck
36. Do you role-play your character?
Not yet
37. Do you write about your character?
Not yet
38. Does your character have a bad temper at times?
Probably
39. Does your character get depressed?
Probably
40. What's your characters favorite animal?
Magpies
41. Does your character have any fears?
Bad luck
42. Does your character have any weaknesses?
His dependance on luck
43. Does your character look up to anyone?
No
44. Does your character like music?
Maybe
45. What's your character's favorite type of music?
Undecided
46. Is he/she impatient?
Yes
47. What's something funny about your character?
He's very eccentric and extreme in emotions, but is never very serious.
48. Nicknames?
777, Nine Lives, Maddox
49. Does your character curse?
Probably
50. This test is over, what does your character have to say?
"Now get out of here, I need to look for my lucky rabbit's foot."
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